Finding Your Authentic Self - Part I

You wouldn't think that it would be that difficult to know yourself. After all, you've lived with you for your whole life. But so much of what we "know" about ourselves is the result of external input and influence. You store away in your subconsciousness everything you've ever been told about yourself -- every compliment, every criticism. You also store away all of your own misconceptions and ideas borne from fear and insecurity, as well as those ideas and misconceptions that you pick up from the magazines and television.

So how do we go about sifting through all of these ideas and perceptions and figure out who we really are -- our authentic self?

You can start by being alone with yourself. I know that's a difficult thing for many people. With family obligations, work and relationships, solitary time can be hard to come by. However, it's really crucial to your own personal growth to find some time, somewhere, to spend with yourself.

This time should be a form of meditation -- for reflection with no specific agenda. You don't necessarily need to sit in a quiet room, crosslegged, staring at a spot on the wall - but if you're comfortable with this form of meditation that's great. Your time can be spent walking, gardening, sitting, or any other solitary activity that doesn't require a great deal of thought. (No TV -- television just puts more negative impressions in your mind and keeps you from thinking at all.)

Start with 20 minutes a few times a week. Try to clear your thoughts... no agenda, no self-criticism, no to-do list planning. Just be quiet in your mind and see what pops up. The most important thing to remember in this process is NO JUDGMENT. Try to look at your thoughts objectively and with curious interest - don't criticize. Be kind to yourself. Think of your authentic self as a new friend who might be a little shy at first, afraid of not being accepted. Give yourself a little space and I think you'll be amazed at the things you discover.

Next week: Finding Your Authentic Self - Part 2: Dealing with all those Thoughts